He had been following me for most of the night. Saying nothing. Who the fuck was he ? I stopped, turned around and waited for him to come within reach. I butted him so hard that I could hear parts of his face crack. He vomited in pain and collapsed on all fours, bleeding and moaning. A mercury fist was driven into the back of his head. Silver spat inside his skull. The boy was gone. I relaxed, breathed in, and carried on walking.
City of mirrors
an oriental lamp                      her hard high heels
candles                      a stone floor
keys                      his cough
books                      no music
a wooden floor                      television breath
paintings                      blue wind
hot tea                      a cold zoo
me                      you
City of mirrors
From a room across the river
Kisses. Souls in holes
Snake-neck turns to meet me,
greet me, eat me
she’s eating with her fingers
singing with her fingers,
sharp-eyes
a young rat
hooking pork
and sucking sauce,
her soft cheeks stuffed
with peas / rice balls
Dentists can tell how long a girl has been vomiting just by looking inside her mouth.
City of mirrors
same old faces, same old faces
same old places, same old places
my thirsty girl, you ask a lot
my thirsty girl, in fact I know you not
my thirsty girl, hooked on black beer
my thirsty girl, avoiding-being-here
the simplicity of holding hands –
simply
forgotten
City of mirrors
I’m a dead man walking
under harder rain,
absorbing bodies, objects, habits –
soft sculptures of the sane
I’m in a little black cell
in a big white hotel,
embracing enemies
and fucking friends
City of mirrors
You
took away our land
you
ripped sea from sand
you
tore away the skin
from each broken hand,
Bullets – easy needles of eviction,
you watched us drop in the snow,
planting bones you knew
we couldn’t sow,
but as I look at you I know :
you’re scared to leave
     scared to breathe
   scared of beauty
scared of pain
      scared of scared –
The King of Nothing,
under another train
I’m an older bird
in an older tree
wiser wings cutting trails
through the metal forest
City of mirrors
eye contact
a shy contact
a dry contract
I try sometimes
sometimes
(I hide)
The sweet science of bruising
Illness in a face
The floating brothel
Beach Blood
City of mirrors
so then he had sex
with his mother
who then gave birth
to a healthy baby boy
but-he-could-not-
decide-whether-he-was
a proud father
or a jealous brother
Animals and children of the state of mind
the step this way out of sight and sound BITE
I can’t resist her cyst
City of mirrors
These black mountains
red fountains of spain
anonymous breastbones
raining brains, raining brains
you’re never too old to be sold
suicide rainbows
summer flu
a guillotine dream
City of mirrors
His legs and arms strained like wire. She covered his eyes, then curled his head firmly towards the floor. She jabbed the glass into the side of his neck and sliced across his thin throat. She leaned heavily into the wound, pressing deeper into the kill-hole.
City of Mirrors - part 5
oil
grease
leather
rubber
velvet
steel
plastic
glass
water
oxygen
bandages
blood
city of mirrors
the EYE
the hook
the wall
the candle
the book
the smile
the laugh
the breath
the teeth
the drink
the nerves
the smoke
the waiting
the eye
the HOOK
city of mirrors
incarceration
containment
punishment
surveillance
rehabilitation
recovery
resistance
deception
manipulation
introspection
city of mirrors
conservatism
indifference
patience
perserverance
calculation
protocol
instruction
reflection
independance
incentive
city of mirrors
domination
blackmail
pollution
euthanasia
execution
extermination
rape
murder
constipation
pleasure
city of mirrors
cold boy / refuel me
cold boy / refuse me
cold boy / re-use me
O juvenile : blossom and decay
O juvenile : against silence
O juvenile : each new address = another burning nest
O juvenile : (don’t believe your dreams)
O juvenile : a defecating angel
O juvenile :       cocksure
trigger happy
                 sure – fire – sure –shot
     (secret neurotic)
O juvenile : nice eyes
O juvenile : nice ice
O juvenile : into minds
O juvenile : in two minds
O juvenile : you’re happy now
but you’ll be dead soon
you’ll be dead soon
but you’re happy now
O juvenile : learning to wear / this city / like a skin
O juvenile : losing another day
city of mirrors
Speech police
Sleep thieves
Snipers
Throat Cutters
Surgical Groupies
Machine birds
Machine birds are singing
the machine birds are screaming
these machine birds are killing me
Machine birds ! Machine birds !
and then my pianist put her hand through a window (she wanted
to hear « knuckle-fat sing ») Why ? « Why not. »
city of mirrors
(elation)
hot flower schools
pools of liver
traumatic perfume
young grey bodies
(INHALE)
climbing
CLIMBING TALKING FIGHTING PLAYING CRYING FARTING
FUCKING FLYING LAUGHING FALLING EATING HEALING
SLEEPING WALKING DYING TRYING SMILING DRINKING
SUCKING LYING FLOATING RUNNING LOVING CHEWING
TOUCHING RISING STABBING STROKING HATING GIVING
LOSING BREATHING TAKING FAKING SINKING KNOWING
COMIN' LOOSE
honey boy is melting
sticking to the floor,
if there’s art in his face
I can’t see it anymore,
walk away, walk away
walk away, walk away
abandon ship, abandon ship
old heads rising
rising from the ground,
dry brains / wooden veins
not.a.single.sound
walk away, walk away
walk away, walk away
abandon ship, abandon ship
(you’re not so cool
when your goldtooth’s
comin’ loose, are you pal?
saving money won’t save your face.
A good pirate always shares his treasure.)
I don’t need a czar…..
an occasional star……
concrete eczema (aka gas flowers)
When you want to
when you want to
you know you can,
when you want to
when you want to
you know you can,
(sever the witch’s head)
(sever the witch’s head)
Expressive repression is killing you
Expressive repression is killing you
Your head is a house of concrete eczema
Your head is a house of concrete eczema
You gotta find a way
You gotta find a way
to stay to stay to stay
but status low
it just won’t go
you know you know you know
help me / hate me / help me / hate me
stop the drinking – start the thinking
[This is the night of the long knives]
hooked then cooked
cooked then sucked
sucked then fucked
a generous vagina
and a guilty cock
(future ruins)
And her first marriage failed
crazy eyebrows
I was the ocean, I was the sea.
I was the sun, and I was the moon
So why are these children painting at me ?
So why are these children painting at me ?
born north of nowhere, looks like I die,
die south of somewhere, die south of somewhere
no one will ever notice when I'm gone
cos I'm only known for crazy eyebrows
is it he plastic flowers, in a big straw hat ?
now who's idea, who's idea was that ?
I take my time, I ain't no mug
slippin' past like a long, slow dryg
born north of nowhere, looks like I die,
die south of somewhere, sie south of somewhere
no one will ever notice when I'm gone
cos I'm only known for crazy eyebrows.
is it he plastic flowers ? is it he plastic flowers ?
born north of nowhere, looks like I die !
slippin' past like a long, slow dryg...
born north of nowhere, looks like I die...
die south of somewhere, die south of somewhere...
no one will ever notice when I'm gone...
I'm only known for crazy eyebrows...
is it he plastic flowers ? is it he plastic flowers ?
now who's idea, who's idea was that ?
born north of nowhere ! die south of somewhere !
born north of nowhere ! die south of somewhere !
So why are these children painting at me ? me !
why are these children painting at me ? me !
I was the ocean, I was the sea
I was the sun, and I was the moon.
crocus
A gentle breath rises
warming into earth,
the stiff soil splinters,
another fragile birth.
Death, Fear, Freedom
The brutal juice of growth
chokes the tunnels of my veins,
I no longer fear death
and the idea that death
is a looming spectre
or a dislocated presence,
I AM DEATH
I become the manifestation
of my own sceptic fears,
I AM FEAR
I am free to ease my breathing,
into infinite gentle sleep,
I AM FREEDOM
my young life rolls blind,
revolving in an air pocket of fate,
reality stings, seemingly demented,
I am the beating heart
of a near perfect circle ;
THIS FLIGHTLESS BIRD SOARS !
Dog Tag
Daily we move, through circles of mist, lightly wrapped in Nature's breath,
her ancient trails carved in dust. Warm thoughts tremble, effortlessly
rising.
The flesh of reality transforms into the shadow of illusion. Primal
wordbirth overflows in our search for some proo f who we think we are.
Eyeballs are dipped into the red dust, f each waking moment. Decisions
ripen, and the search continue Fertile. Fruitful. Futile.
Our minds are empty, eager, virginal membranes. We are blessed with the
gift of knowing nothing. This theatre of skin and air entertains us,
mercilessly. Possible identities unfold, hidden beneath the mask of who we
think we were, are, and could be:
BOY KILLER CRIPPLE MAN FOOL ANARCHIST ARTIST LIAR GOD
INDIVIDUAL PUPPET THIEF GROUPIE JUNKIE PRIEST CHILD
BASTARD LOVER LEECH ANGEL DEVIL KING ENEMY FRAUD
TERRORIST FRIEND DAUGHTER WHORE CORPSE SAINT ADDICT
BITCH JOKER RECLUSE HERO PRINCESS FATHER BEAST
CONFORMIST FIGHTER PRINCE ABUSER LADY BABY HEALER
BROTHER NEIGHBOUR VICTIM MOTHER STRANGER SON REBEL
HUMAN.
Unmask the truth from the brittle bone of honesty. Embrace elation.
Embrace despair. Despair mobilises new strengths. All parts may make the
whole.
double whisky
DOUBLE WHISKY
DOUBLE VISION
DOUBLE CHIN
DOUBLE DEATH
echo breath
blue eyes
tight skin
a soft brain
a shaved head
a warm skull
thick blood
a fat vein
a stone wall
cells pressed
a skull cracked
flesh flaked
a head drained
a dry cry
all sucked
into silence
FALLING INTO LIGHT
Shadow of the father, shadow of the mother
blood of the father, blood of the mother
the baby breathes
feeling her way along widening walls of womb,
towards unfamiliar smells and tremors,
glistening molluscs slide across her limbs
occasionally attaching themselves
and briefly sucking into her soft veins
wet mother groans :
genital muscle swells and cracks
separating into curtains of skin
as her bloodball begins to appear,
grunting blind
into the endless slits of light.
FIREDANCE
Wide eyed creatures
blaze in
sane
they ride the night
and her ragged mane,
a firedance bursts across the sky,
eroded stars unfold and fly
come ride the night
and her ragged mane,
come ride the night
and blaze in
sane
so go
spill yourself tonight
(when all the people here are sleeping)
spill yourself tonight
(while the spiritworld lies weeping)
spill yourself tonight
(with only suicide moths for friends)
spill yourself tonight
(an agony expanded, through a crippled crystal lens)
I would
if I could
but I can’t
so I won’t
firefly
Firefly :
growing poems
on her nipples,
pierced red erections
that fly in the wind
like Japanese prayer flags,
wrapped in sap
she pushes out her breasts,
enticing me to chew,
nipples tear and poems fall,
she lies back laughing
as we watch the blood tickle over
her soft white ribs.
Gas Flowers (aka "Concrete Eczema")
I remember you, remember me
I remember you, remember me
Yes, I remember you, remember me ?
We were an altar and an open vein,
thin skin and red rain,
small smiles
shallow highs
warm flies
staying drunk,
Quietly
familiar feelings fold
implode
(and I remember you)
My autumn sun :
a winter disc
blinking behind clouds
crisp eye of the dead
(and I remember you)
It’s a freefall
This dying room – Our final womb
I remember you, remember me
I remember you, remember me
Yes, I remember you, remember me ?
We were an altar and an open vein,
thin skin and red rain,
small smiles
shallow highs
warm flies
staying drunk,
It happens. It’s not important.
It happens. It’s not important.
It simply happens.
I think I want to live
I think I want to give (my life away).
giving blood
giving blood
smelling blood
rubbing blood
burning blood
pissing blood
drinking blood
BEING BLOOD
Goddess
I want to climb high inside
the soul of a goddess,
walk under her wide ribs,
roll accross her veins,
light small fires
around the pink crust
of her anus,
then breathing naked
I'll unwrap and read
my scroll of prayers
written in
her name
hang in hope (aka scolded golds)
Nipples
naked
slowly
hardening
rolled
between teeth
tiny pebbles
of blood
like red berries
bursting
flaking skins
breed brittle crusts,
a glistening tongue
lines a bloated spine,
we feast on a carpet
of eager limbs,
some broken,
some still warm
Hollow cheeks spit wide,
bones open
a smile drips through
from butt-fuck thrust,
anus hangs
anus hangs
HERMIT'S BLUES
Been alone, unknown, for far too long,
cracking the seed that houses my mind,
it's time to sit up, relax, and unwind,
at last I've slipped from cold cave, unseen,
guided by tales of land rich and green,
nothing less than a goddess will do,
eruptions of flesh to pull me through;
the devil grins from the top of a hill,
absorbing all movement, sat perfectly still,
he knows how I need and want more :
love and hate, peace and war,
I crave the golden spasms of the addict,
be they junkie, killer, lover or thief,
fires and feasts to sweeten each day,
god of all gods
I need and want more :
love and hate, peace and war.
i have power
I have power :
marks of punctuation hang in my verse
like baby axes.
insomania sexuelle
On a warm bed. A honey head. Damp genitals. Sticky armpits. Aching neck. Body brping. Not sleeping. Turning. Rolling. Weeping. Dripping. At dawn. Not sleeping. Swallowing milk and biscuits. Under artificial light. Another painful red erection. Tight eyes. Bloodfarts. Hot and heavy. Not sleeping. Thinking about fucking. Fucking without thinking. I don't want to think I want to fuck. I don't want to fuck I want to thnk. I don't want to talk I want to fuck. I don't want to fuck I want to talk. I don't want to sleep I want to fuck. I don't want to fuck I want to sleep.
I can feel her heart beat.
Can she smell my dead meat ?
Sex fucks me up
The sex fucks me up
This fucks me up
Sex fuck
Sex fucks
Fucked by sex
Sex fucking
Sexed
My sex fucks you up
This sex fucks us up
Your sex fucks me up
Sex fucks us up
IN - THROUGH - OUT
consuming / digesting / excreting / repeating
INVITING
Attraction, addiction, withdrawal, jealousy,
admiration, fixation, tenderness,
the futility of endless fucking.
The simplicity of holding hands
simply
forgotten.
my princess petal
Fear is a bone
A bone in stone
when you've nowhere to turn,
when you're unable to learn,
when you've no love to waste,
when you've no peace to taste,
you turn in on yourself
light a fire
and burn
Oh, princess petal
(impaled in sky and forced to fly)
Oh, princess petal
(sweet honey toujours prozac sunny)
Oh, princess petal
warm meat spinning inside cold metal
Fear is a bone
A bone in stone
never been happier
Never been happier
happy
here
hear
the whore moan
hormone
ring, sting, sing
delight, despite
NO LIGHT
NIGHTWALKER
I’m a nightwalker,
I give birth to spider-children,
see them crawl, watch them fall,
hidden in the damp grass,
I smell bodies coiled in bliss,
In a grave a naked couple
gently unfold inside each other,
Yes, I’m a nightwalker,
I give birth to spider-children,
see them crawl, watch them fall,
Yes, I’m a nightwalker -
floating though it all.
NOTHING FINER
there’s nothing finer
than a blind diner
there’s nothing finer
than a deaf diner,
there’s nothing finer,
than a dumb diner
there’s nothing finer / nothing finer
there’s nothing finer
than sharing a minor
there’s nothing finer
than shaving a minor
there’s nothing finer
than slicing a minor
nothing finer / nothing finer
dreams of a diner
dreams of a diner
wet dreams of a diner
dreams of a diner
dreams of a diner
there’s nothing finer
than sharing a minor
there’s nothing finer
than shaving a minor
there’s nothing finer
than slicing a minor
nothing finer / nothing finer
don’t bore me with your fucking dreams,
bye-bye
fuck off and die
bye-bye
-    you’re watered and fed
-    and with these words
I thee shred,
an eye for a lie
an eye for a lie
-    smokebone mouthtramp
-    smokebone mouthtramp
-    smokebone mouthtramp
there’s nothing finer
than a blind diner
there’s nothing finer
than a deaf diner
there’s nothing finer
than a dumb diner
there’s nothing finer / nothing finer
got your soul on your back
got your soul on your back
whole thing’s gonna crack
whole thing’s gonna crack
‘cos sister blister’s burning black
‘cos sister blister’s burning black
ain’t no way back
ain’t no way back
there’s nothing finer
than a blind diner
there’s nothing finer
than a deaf diner
there’s nothing finer
than a dumb diner
there’s nothing finer / nothing finer
don’t bore me with your fucking dreams,
bye-bye
fuck off and die
bye-bye
-    you’re watered and fed
-    and with these words
I thee shred,
an eye for a lie
an eye for a lie
there’s nothing finer
than a blind diner
there’s nothing finer
dreams of a diner
wet dreams of a diner
dreams, dreams of a diner,
dreams, dreams of a diner,
nothing finer
dreams of a diner
dreams…………
pass me by (my love)
pass me by (my love)
I am dead
You sit drinking flames
Never looking up
To notice ice-cracks
On my lip,
I am gone
Only existing
In the history
Of your skin.
pink champagne
Pink champagne, pink champagne, pink champagne,
sadders but wiser, sadder but wiser,
tongues fuse, tongues fuse, refuse,
small bird, dead and dying,
the sounds of masks
blue,red, brown, black,
Pink champagne, pink champagne, pink champagne,
Psychic stain, Psychic stain, f's your brain
Pink champagne ! pink champagne ! pink champagne !
anatomy of your family :
your rules of mealtime, steal time, steal time,
your rules of mealtime, steal time, steal time,
anatomy, of mine, of his, of her family,
anatomy, your rules of mealtime, steal time,
anatomy of YOUR family !
Razor girls and semen sacks, get
off my fucking fuckin' back !
Pink champagne ! pink champagne !
Anybody for pink champagne ?
                     pink champagne ?
Pink-champ-fuckin-pagne !
Pink chmapagne..... pink champagne.....
A bone in stone
salt and ice (for S.C)
together
we can be
the death of darkness,
our fat kisses
can burn holes
into death's black jaw.
SILLY BILLY
Silly Billy listen to yourself
you can't think straight, you can't walk straight
Silly Billy you're a mess
This girl ain't laughing anymore
she don't want to hold your hand
she don't walk to take your home
cause Blood ain't funny anymore.
Who's the one to keep you in line
who's the one, who's the one
who's the one to show you a sign
who's the one, who's the one.
SILVER ROSES (HIV : heavily into violence)
And then she came to me
with eyes marked HIV:
heavily into violence
heavily into violence
she fed me silver roses
from off a metal tray,
Liberty Bombhead
was showing me the way
she was positively silent
it was her pulverising gift,
she put her hand inside me
and gave my bowels a lift,
she poisoned me the day we met
with eyes marked HIV:
heavily into violence
heavily into violence
she fed me silver roses
from off a metal tray,
Liberty Bombhead
blew me away...
swallowing suns, sucking moons
To bleed is to live. Clouds burst black, and air bones crack. Broken stars roll drunk through dawn : their winter cry embedded in sky. Tiny wings keep me afloat, theaded in honey. I am the ancient healer. The killer. The medicine man who sings as he flies. I am the cripple.
Moon dreams beam into the birthing stars. Ribs and hips unfold, semen sacks ache full. I am the drunken wizard, cloaked in their skin, the one who can cast any spell. My antlers; sacred tusks dipped in blood juice, puncturing golden cloud.
Existence blisters, but I journey to all worlds. I gorge myself on the ritual of this ceaseless search. Death can claim me, and be my guide. I float alone and trawl for the nectar that drips from sweet flesh. The black sun sweeps into my chest and rips out the heart. Cast out to roast in an open desert, my dry screams lie buried under a moutain of sand.
My spirit erupts; sickened and blessed. I am all things. I am nothing. I am the truth. All parts make the whole.
The dispossessed possess themselves. Loose thoughts scatter; blind echoes of intention. i scratch at the earth with my hands, bare. Dig a velvet tunnel, and enter gently. I line the walls whith sweat, warm piss. Print fresh wet tracks, next to fossils woven in rock. I relax and sit. Emptying the entrance to my mind. Tonight I'll bleed and pray, alone in joy.
Sinking beneath clouds is the vening sun. A melting nipple of burning copper.
the art of skinlessness
Lying low in the highlands. A blood-poet. Gaining an element of control by admitting that he has no control. The nature of creativity regularly confronts him with the reality of his own sweet death. He experiences a kind of frozen psychosis, an initiation into skinlessness. Impaled in sky, forced to fly. The artist as hungry ghost, the hungry ghost as blood-poet. Private moments difficult to describe in detail-events that can only be recovered from. Through tis exhaution comes a fragment of peace, then warmth. An emotional ejaculation both horrific and serene.
The work itself exists on the faultline between the breakdown and the breakthrough. The artist is learning to drink the blood from the heart of a dying man. Passion must not be stopped - allow it to kill. Hunt down and feel each misguided thrill. Creativity is a wepaon that helps dilute thoughts of suicide. This needle of light punctures the spine of all blood-poets. Maybe saving lives.
Infancy scars
The looming spectre of the family unit can appear as a microcosm of unease, conflict, hallucination and love - like viewing the manifestations of any WAR.
Contradictory morals and beliefs are perfecly natural but may also lead to sex, slaughter, and agonising death. Infancy scars penetrate the mindscape of th young adult. He is a man giving birth to himself. A mutant King who must siphon reality from the fungus of myth. His art is the illumination of a small black hole, is the piercing pleasure of luminous bed-burns.
HIS DOVE OF PEACE
SWEATS BLOOD
there is a gash in the clouds
There is a gash in the clouds and the sun bleeds through. I am blind to all of this. I stand untouch, unseen. The only light I see is the blackness of my own shadow. Love and touch no longer erupt inside my life. Death stands at the altar, begging to be my wife. The ash of the past rises likesmoke. Burning alone, I kneel in the heat. My body bursts into tongues offlame. Electric vainspill out over the sand. They wriggle and dance like a troup of blue lizards.
threre not there
she said : I think I'll let you live
                   I think I'll let you sieve
                   another day,another day
                   I think I'll let you sieve
                   another day,another day
maybe it was me, or maybe it was you,
or all of us together
the what - the where - the who,
there not there, there not there
there
you don't take over the world takes over
you should know this by nomw, by now !
you don't take other the world takes over
you should know ths by nom, by now !
she said : I think I'll let you live
                   I think I'll let you sieve
                   another day,another day
within the quiet mountain
within the quiet mountain
of her soul
a fireball breathes,
soothing aching ribs
and gently melting ulcers,
heat rises,
wetting and widening
her hollow throat,
in silent preparation
for the return
of her soft voice.
WOODEN BAR
join us at the wooden bar
join us at the wooden bar,
walk across the wooden bridge
walk across the wooden bridge,
share a pint of petrol with me
share a pint of petrol with me,
join us at the wooden bar
join us at the wooden bar,
(this sad temple / this sad temple)
why should I cross the road
to where I’m not wanted ?
join us at the wooden bar
join us at the wooden bar
I did service militaire in Germany
I did service militaire in Germany
listen to my wooden heart
>
listen to my wooden heart
… and I’ll give you anything
           I’ll give you anything
           I’ll give you anything
… yes he’ll give me everything
           he’ll give me everything
           he’ll give me everything